Porn I Like: Futa

I’m going to start this post by splitting a hair, and hoping that others split this particular hair in the same way that I do: in my mind there are two types of “chicks with dicks” porn, which are 1) she-male, in which a person has both male and female genitalia (usually a dick and breasts), and 2) #futanari (or #futa for short, although Wikipedia seems to make a distinction between the two terms), in which a person is pretty predominantly female but with a cock. In some scenarios, especially in comics, a character will start out 100% female and then grow a cock.

The reason that I make this particular distinction is that she-male porn doesn’t turn me on (in my mind I sort of put it into the gay category, though I know it’s not), whereas futa does (in my mind I sort of put it into the lesbian category, though I know it’s not). Obviously this is a pretty fuzzy distinction – in both cases the characters have both male and female parts – so you could probably also say that if it turns me on I call it futa and if it doesn’t I call it she-male. That would be a bit reductionist, but not wholly incorrect either.

I actually discovered futa porn pretty late in life, mostly because the whole she-male porn thing doesn’t really turn me on. If I’m skipping through some porn and see anything along the lines of a chick with a dick, I typically move on to the next thing pretty quickly.

As an aside, doesn’t “skipping through some porn” sound just lovely? I picture myself gaily frolicking in a meadow, surrounded by bouncing breasts and cute, pert asses...

But as I was saying, because the chicks with dicks thing never turned me on I never made any kind of distinction and never bothered investigating any further. The first hint that there might be some stuff I enjoyed was when I was downloading some toons and found Innocent Dick Girls (you can find a bit on Smutty under #innocentdickgirls, or at the Innocent Dick Girls website). I always find myself more willing to get into a particular type of porn when I find a well drawn cartoon version of it – I might be screwy in the head – so Innocent Dick Girls was sort of my entry into futa porn. But it didn’t cause me to go out looking for more; it just allowed me to open my mind a bit.

My real entry into futa porn was when I came across a video of two futas right before (I guess) one of them was getting married, and noticed some things about it:

• First, and most obvious, it was live action but still very hot. Most futa stuff you’ll find is of the toon variety, and I would have thought that anything live action would be so cheezy as to not be hot at all, but this video proved me wrong.
• Although it’s obviously fake – by which I mean that it’s even more fake than “regular” porn usually is – they at least tried to make the cocks look real. It would have spoiled the effect if they were walking around with obvious dildos hanging from their crotches (which you will sometimes find; big, stiff, obviously plastic cocks barely hanging onto the actresses).
• Again, along the fake lines, the orgasms were extremely fake. No balls produce that much cum. Hell, a fire hose doesn’t produce that much liquid. In the cartoons this much jizz is often produced, but that’s cartoons and everything gets exaggerated there; I wasn’t expecting them to go all out like that in the live action version, but they did. One of the commenters on that Fantasti page mentioned that the cumshots were over the top and dopey, but I felt the opposite: porn is fake anyway, and I’ve already mentioned how much I love cum in porn, so it was fine for me.

The video above was produced by Futanaria, and a subsequent search led me to a torrent with a whole mess of videos from them, most of which are of the same quality. (Have I mentioned that I don’t tend to pay for porn? Oh, yes I have.) 

Since the videos above turn me on I obviously don’t have  problem with the fact that all of this futa stuff is quite fake. It might even be part of the turn-on; the other she-male porn – the stuff that doesn’t turn me on – is arguably more realistic. I don’t mind that the cocks are unrealistically big, though I find it a turn-off when they’re too big (sort of like the ultra-huge breasts in cartoons are a turn-off for me); I don’t mind that the cumshots are unrealistically... um... dramatic. (If you like these huge cumshots as well, check out Freaks of Cock. I have a feeling these are fake too, though they seem to play it like it’s not, but again, I don’t care. There’s a music video/cumpilation on Fantasti, or an even longer cumpilation.) I don’t even mind the ridiculous scenarios that are sometimes used as a backdrop to these futa scenes; they’re only slightly more cheezy than any other porn scenes.

So is there any type of futa porn that I don’t like? Of course there is! If the posts on this blog so far have proven anything it’s that I have all kinds of distinctions in the types of porn I like and the types I don’t. When it comes to futa porn, I’m not a huge fan of the futa girls fucking dudes. Maybe it’s a weird distinction, but for me it puts it back into the gay category. When a futa girl fucks another futa, or when a futa girl fucks a “normal” girl, it’s sort of half lesbian sex and half hetero sex (since, after all, it’s a cock she’s getting fucked by), and I’m okay with both straight and lesbian sex, so it’s all good. But when a futa girl fucks a dude it’s sort of half gay sex and... well, it’s more like 80% gay sex and 20% straight sex. Even that 20% I’m not sure about; I only make it that high because, technically, there is a girl involved. Sort of.