What Does It Feel Like When a Guy Cums?

I can’t tell you.

Is it because it’s a secret? No, I have no secrets from you, my dear blog readers. Ask me anything! I’ve written about my own masturbation being interrupted, about the fact that I’m uncircumcised, about precum (and the fact that sometimes it’s comforting to feel it in my boxers after sex or after yankin it), and hashtags I’m embarrassed to follow, and a bunch of other things besides.

Is it because I lack the words? Ha! I never lack for words! This is probably the most verbose blog around. (It’s not a competition, I’ll gladly concede the title if there’s a more verbose blog somewhere.) I recently wrote a post which was nothing but pictures, and took over 50 words just to say “I’m not writing anything here.” I just said in 5 words here what I used 50 for there – and I should point out that I didn’t actually need to put any words. I could have used 0, and just up the pictures of the boobies. Would readers have been confused, and thought they’d wandered into Tumblr by mistake? Possibly, but if they’re anything like me they’d have forgotten all about it after the 3rd or 4th picture of boobs.

The reason I can’t tell you is because it’s different every time. And I don’t mean minor, subtle differences, I mean the whole experience can be different from orgasm to orgasm.

How much cum comes out? It’s probably the same amount every time, but it feels very different from orgasm to orgasm. Sometimes it feels like barely any is dribbling out, and other times it feels like I’m a human firehose. (As of time of writing nobody has ever drowned under my output, so apparently the world is still safe.)

Is it better during sex than it is during masturbation? Yes, definitely! Well… almost always. As a rule yes, but there have been occasions when I’ve masturbated and it’s been so good I almost passed out, and there have been times when I’ve been having sex and the orgasm was just so-so. (“Just so-so” is about the worst an orgasm can possibly be – it’s still an orgasm! A so-so orgasm is still probably the best part of my day.) I’ve even faked orgasms during sex just to please my partners or just to get it over with. (This only works when wearing condoms, of course.) On the other hand, I’ve also had multiple orgasms during sex, which is rare for men and probably nearly impossible when masturbating.

Does it hurt? No, of course not! Well… except… sometimes, it does kind of… burn a bit. On occasions when I’m really taking my time with it, building up to it, maybe getting close and backing off a few times, when I finally do let myself go there’s sometimes a burning sensation. I don’t know if it’s because the precum has “worn off” or something, but it happens from time to time. Which is not a complaint, because those times are usually always very intense, so the overall effect is amazing.

And it’s too bad that I can’t tell you what the male orgasm is like because this blog has a mostly female readership, based on the comments. I’m sure everyone, male and female, sometimes wonders what orgasms are like for the opposite gender, and I can’t imagine my readers are any different. I definitely wonder what the female orgasm feels like. For that matter, I wonder what boobs feel like, too. Men have boobs, but it’s not nearly the same.

I’m sure this type of wondering has led countless people to have fantasies about inhabiting a body of the opposite gender for the purpose of having sex and seeing what it feels like. I follow a girl on Smutty named GeekGirl who has a ton of captioned photos along those lines (under the hashtags #forcedtransformation and #becomingagirl), where some dude has a spell cast on him or something to turn him into a chick and he ends up becoming a cock slut (by choice or by force). She’s not the only one who has those kinds of fantasies, though, I’m sure it’s very common if not universal. (And it’s possible she’s not even a she; given the subject matter of those posts it’s possible she’s a he and this is part of the fantasy, but it doesn’t matter either way.)

Actually, “fantasy” is too strong a word. We don’t all fantasize about it – I wouldn’t say I “fantasize” about it, the idea of becoming a woman doesn’t turn me on – but I’m sure we all wonder about it.

I had a conversation recently with a female friend about whether men and women are alike or different when it comes to picturing what people are like in bed; we discovered that both of us randomly wonder/picture what others are like in bed – people we meet at work, or on the subway, or pass on the street, or whatever – and that just because we wonder about it doesn’t mean we’re fantasizing about it, or even including ourselves in the scenario. The more attractive the person is, of course, the more likely it is to become a mini fantasy in which they’re fucking me, but usually it’s just a passing, idle curiosity. “I wonder if she’s a screamer? I wonder if she gets into it, or if she’s more passive and sedentary? I wonder if she secretly likes it in the ass?” It’s the same sort of idle curiosity I get when I think about the female orgasm: I wonder what it feels like?

But since my orgasms are so different from one to the next, and presumably everyone else’s are as well, maybe my wandering imagination is too restrictive. Instead of wondering what the female orgasm feels like, maybe I should wonder what specific orgasms feel like. Maybe I should wonder what other men’s orgasms feel like. When a male pornstar cums during a scene, is it as pleasurable as when I cum while fucking a woman? Or is it more like when I masturbate?

When I think about the female orgasm I know that I’ll never experience one, despite what GeekGirl sometimes posts on her Smutty feed. But when we think about advances in porn it’s always fun to imagine a device or technology that allows us to not only watch pornstars in action but even feel what they’re feeling while they’re doing it. It would mean that orgasms couldn’t be faked anymore – not necessarily a good thing – but it would perhaps give us an opportunity to try something we’d never otherwise get to try: see what an orgasm feels like for someone else.

Then again, maybe I wouldn’t even bother putting myself in the place of the girls. Maybe I’d put myself in the place of the dudes, so I could fuck the girls. After all, pornstars are sexy, and I’m not likely to fuck any in real life, so that would be my chance, right? Maybe I’d let myself feel the girls’ feelings from time to time, out of curiosity, but on the whole I’m guessing that I’d much rather fuck them then be fucked as them. If I really want to know what the female orgasm feels like I guess I’ll have to look for well-written erotic literature (and hope that it was actually written by a woman).